If tomorrow corrupt

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9a9ce----3.jpg $~ ~ ~$If tomorrow corrupt

Protest.jpeg "And will rise the protest"

PupkinGuns.jpgTake from closets their rifles

BEAR-cavalry fin small.jpg..as a whiskery bear [1]

Svetlana9.130b.jpg Svetlana4.101a.jpg Puritanas and sexiest putas

If tomorrow corrupt is hymn described in utopia Tartaria.

Hymn of Tartaria

If tomorrow corrupt,
If the prudence disrupt,
If electional fraud commenced
The Tartarian crowd
Send the files to the court
And the frauders will be sentenced.

Teachers and the students,
Will detect the moments
Of commitment electional fraud;
They describe the context,
And will rise the protest
And the voice of protesters be loud.

If tomorrow corrupt,
If the prudence disrupt,
If a fraud in administrations, -
All Tartarian people
Take from closets their rifles,
And defend prudence for our nations.

Yellows, blacks, whites and reds,
With long hair and skinheads,
Not allow criminal revolution;
Winter's cold, summers warm,
We'll stay for every farm;
To defend our Great Constitution!

If tomorrow terror,
If tomorrow be war,
If barbarians here appear, -
All Tartiarian people
Take in hands their rifles,
And we'll fight as a whiskery bear.

Islamists, Communists,
Christians and Buddhists,
Will forget for a while their disputes;
Farmers and the rentiers,
Doctors and engineers,
Puritanes and sexiest putas, -

All together will fight
To defend our right
To have different our religions,
We'll be all, hand to hand,
To defend our land,
Keep our virtues in any collisions.


As other Tartarian songs, the hymn above is variation of historic art of centuries 19, 20 and 21st. Apparently, the Russian song from the Soviet propagandist movie Если завтра война is used (1938). However, the official language of Tartaria is declared to be Basic English; so, it is translated.

Foreigner in Tartaria, Ruvim Pechor, listens this song at the picnic, and tries to understand, why he dislikes it. Then he realizes, that the Soviet original of this song had been used as a pretext for horrible massacre and mass terror, extermination of a half of population of a big country. However, the Tartarians do not know the history of the song, they consider it just as a hymn of the basic civilization achievements: publicity, democracy, right of citizen go have any weapon, cooperation of various races and religions.

TartariaFlag00.jpg Flag of Tartaria

In the common Tartarian paradigm, there exist only 4 basic human races: black, red, yellow and white. These colours are used in flag of Tartaria as symbol of cooperation. All other races are considered as mixtures of the four. The war of year 1918-1920 is interpreted as war between white race and red race and extermination of the white race (Красная армия всех сильней, "С белыми покончим - коммунизм построим" и т.п.). Ruvim does not try to suggest any other, more complicated concept about human races, racism and history of Tartaria.


In Tartaria, there is no age discrimination with respect to any activity, including armed defence of the Prudence and Constitution. In particular, any Tartaria citizen (if no mental illness is detected) may handle a lethal gun.

Some couplets of some of variations of the hymn take into account this feature of laws of Tartaria.

Ruvim Pehor listens this hymn (and the discussion) at the picnic.


ZaRusskiNarod.jpg За кровавую Родину

At the Picnik, the students sing hymn If tomorrow corrupt and then discuss it.

One of students indicates, that this hymn is translation from the old song:
Если завтра война,
Если груда говна
В виде сталинской воли нагрянет -
Весь советский народ
Как один идиот
За кровавую Родину встанет..

Another student suggests a little bit different version of the old song:
Если завтра война,
Если завтра в поход,
Если черная сила нагрянет -
Весь советский народ
Как один человек
За советскую Родину встанет..

This version causes strong critics. The main objections are in Russian:

  1. Это пропагандистская переделка. И весьма грубая.
  2. В переделке повторяется слово "советский". Это тавтология, и так понятно, какая Родина и совков.
  3. Не в склад, не в лад: тупые советские пропагандисты не смогли подобрать складную замену эпитету, которым поэты характеризовали СССР.
  4. Тогда была специальная бригада троллей-порпагандистов, они занимались такими переделками. Их институт до самого Бигпуфа так и назывался, Переделкино.

However, the students agreed, that the hymn If tomorrow corrupt is much better, than its Russian prototype: "Из говна сделали конфетку".


  1. https://partizan74.livejournal.com/58160.html Дихтяренко Николай Николаевич Теперь, кому не надоели партизаны на медведях, может увидеть мой рисунок на обложке книги от "Яузы". Март 1, 2008.


Barbarian, Bigpuf, Designate Russia as state sponsor of terrorism, Emulation, Fiction, History, Les Miserables, Putin world war, Religion, Revolution, Russia, Ruvim Pechor, Tartaria, Tartaria01, Tartaria02, Tartaria03, Tartaria04, Террор USSR, Utopia

Агрессор и оккупант, Конституция Тартарии,